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  • Sanborn County Officials: Hot Times Call For Hotshot Truck Insurance
    Welcome back, Sanbornians! This is a special report on some very distressing trends we’ve seen popping up over the past couple of years. It’s well known that crime is on the rise across the nation, along with a very unfortunate simultaneous rise in the number of fatal car accidents. These two factors have combined to […]
  • Sanborn Ethics Committee Approves New Ethical Insect Eradication Methods
    Welcome back, Sanbornians! As many of you know, we recently needed to move our publishing house (again!) thanks to the building being condemned. The culprit this time? Termites! Yes, the termite scourge has returned once again. This time they’re driven by the once-a-Millenium monsoon rains currently flooding Death Valley. Swarms of the unique desert termites […]
  • A Bright History Of Corruption
    Hello and welcome back to the hometown rag, Sanbornians! Some of you have noticed that posting frequency has slimmed to a mere trickle in the past half year, and I am sad to say that there is no end in sight for that. I am afraid, dear readers, that being a wandering poet and local […]
  • Sanborn County Alert Level: RED
    Welcome back for this special news bulletin, Sanbornians! Summer is here once again, and that means the annual Sanborn crime wave is taking its usual course through the county. This year is promising to be a record breaker, however! The people of our humble county know that when the rest of the state sneezes, we’re […]
  • Pests Out of Control In Sanborn
    Hello and welcome to another addition to our home county rag, Sanbornians! I come to you today with yet another breaking report! Yes, it’s that time of the year again – the rats have emerged from their winter hiding holes and descended upon the city in a wave of furry horror. Our phone lines have […]